None of us knows what is ahead of us, but we know it will help if people are with us on the journey – people are not frightened to listen to us, who will not leave us to negotiate the last part of the track alone.  (Rod McLeod)

Feedback Comments for first Caregivers Programme of 2018
​What worked well in today’s session?
“Great facilitator, kind, supportive”
“Understanding from both career and patient”
“Understanding more about the care provided”
“Being able to listen and open up with emotions”
“Interaction, wider spiritual focus, not just religious”
“The talk and the company”
“Interesting and informative session”
“Lots of information”
“Learnt new information for wills”
“Things have been explained well”
“Most informative session and sharing knowledge”
“Nice conversation, relaxed, friendly, thoughtful”
“Lots of input”
“Good group discussions and facilitator”
“Sharing of thoughts, group work, lunch was a bonus”
“The session opened up a lot of awareness for me”
“Interesting session with helpful advice”
“Very hard topic but necessary and good”
“Acknowledgement that I am not the only one in a situation”
“Open discussion and sharing of thoughts and feelings”
“Group session with everyone involved”

Oh the comfort
The inexpressible comfort
Of feeling safe with a person.
Having neither to weight thoughts’
Nor measure words,
But to pour them all out just as they are,
Chaff and grain together,
And a faithful hand
Will take and sift them,
Keep what is worth keeping,
And, with a breath of kindness,
Blow the rest away.
George Elliot

Being a caregiver for someone who is sick is a demanding task even in the short term. When this care-giving role continues for many months, even years, it can feel like an impossible task.
 
The fact that you are reading this suggests that you may be in this position. We want you to know that there are some simple things that can assist you regain your strength.
 
Some tips for you……….
REMEMBER there are at least TWO people who need to be cared for – the person who is sick – and you. Neglecting your own needs is not helpful either in the short or long term.

THINK ABOUT the care you are giving.

• Is it primarily physical care with a focus on the patient’s medical needs and comfort care e.g. giving medication, personal hygiene, washing, cooking, and cleaning?
• What about the patients’ emotional and psychological needs? Are you able to talk together about what has been / is important to them / you / your family?
• Are you able to cry, laugh, be sad together or do you try and protect each other from your feelings, whatever they are?
• What about intimacy needs? Have the opportunities for touch, sex, affection been affected by the illness? Are you able to find other ways to meet these needs?
• What about the patient’s spiritual needs? Whether you are religious or not it is important to make sense of and to find meaning in what happens to us in life. Are you able to ask the questions that don’t have an easy answer?
  
• If you belong to a faith community are they involved?  

ALLOW others to help.
Family, friends, neighbours, church community, Hospice Wairarapa and other health professionals. All can assist and support you in your care of your loved one. All you have to do is allow them. Remember, you have needs too. You can’t do this alone.

SOME PRACTICAL IDEAS TO GET YOU GOING

*Get some physical exercise
*Put your feet up
*Spend some time with a friend
*Meditate / pray / reflect

​SAY YES WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO:
*Do the shopping
*Sit with the patient
*Prepare a meal
*Look after the children
*Mow the lawn

FIND SOMEONE WITH A LISTENING EAR WHO WILL:
*Let you talk about your feelings without saying ‘You should / shouldn’t feel like that”.
*Not give advice or tell you what to do.
*Let you ask your questions without having to have an answer.
​
ASK FOR WHAT YOU NEED FROM:
*Family
*Friends
*Health Professionals

​Hospice services are available free of charge to all of those that have a life limiting illness in the Wairarapa.
If you are interested in this service please contact our Programme Coordinator or call 06 378 8888 to discuss further.